


sing for me

by kaisdaddy



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: 1920s, Angst, Historical AU, Implications of suicide, M/M, Some Fluff, colonel yifan, singer junmyeon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-15 04:06:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17521697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaisdaddy/pseuds/kaisdaddy
Summary: Junmyeon was the songbird that couldn’t be trapped, yet Yifan managed to capture his heart, even if he wasn’t supposed to.





	sing for me

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first time claiming a prompt for a project like this and while it’s been plenty fun time got a little pressed to the end because of my work alksjdkjsjd but!!! I hope you all will enjoy this and the rest of the fic fest!

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ Thick smoke rose from the buildings, screams of agony and fear still echoed between crumbled burning buildings as he took in the view from the grand house in the middle of the town square. Bodies littered the streets and the tangy scent of blood clung in the air like a thick layer refusing to rise. The sun was giving off a red glow through the smoke clouds as it set behind the mountains. _

 

_ Turning his back to the large windows Yifan laid his eyes on the now former president of Korea bleeding out slumped over in his chair by his large desk. Beautiful polished wooden floor was stained in the darkest shade of red as the blood seeped into the cracks. Other soldiers were rummaging through the house, looking for whomever else was hiding within the house of importance.  _

 

_ Lifting a gloved hand to his cheek to wipe away a few drops of blood the colonel listened to guns going off somewhere in the house, releasing a small breath. It was all over, they won. _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The smoke of cigarettes filled the room, glasses clinking together and loud cherry chattering between men, majority of them soldiers happily singing Song to the Auspicious Cloud after returning from a long journey from the Korean Peninsula back to Beijing. Performers were on stage dancing, singing and showing off any other talent the patron seemed fit for the company. 

 

Yifan held his glass of rice wine in his right hand, back straight as he listened to his officers and lieutenant colonel chattering about finally coming home. How much they missed their wives and kids, sleeping in a real bed, whatever you may miss on a battle that took 5 years. However, the colonel was simply glad it was finally over, even if he had no special person to return to. 

 

But that didn't mean he wasn't going to enjoy himself, he had been at the front of the physical battle and been the one to point his rifle to the presidents head. That act had been what stopped the 4 year long war between nations, and would probably earn him a beautiful house and a higher title. Major General Wu didn't sound all too bad. 

 

“What are you grinning about?” Lieutenant colonel Zhang chuckled and took of his gloves as he returned to the table with two glasses of whiskey. Yifan chuckled and took his glass and swirled the brown liquid on the clear crystal glass. 

 

“The accomplishments of our troops and the pride of my country. Nothing more complicated than that my comrade.” Abandoning his glass of rice wine he took a swig of strong tasting whiskey, letting out a pleased sigh at the burning sensation in his throat. “Shouldn't you be home with your wife and child? You missed the birth of your son and you're spending your time here?”

 

“As much as I love my wife and child I want to celebrate as well, they're fast asleep and I'll return until sunrise.” Cheering erupted in the crowd as yet another beautiful young woman exited the stage after her lewd dancing and suggestive looks. A minute after she exited a man stepped out, or should he say boy, he didn't look much older than 25. 

 

Stepping up to the round microphone he offered a sweet smile to the audience paying little attention to him as the live band began playing Remembering to Forget. The stunning beauty the man withheld was enough to make Yifan pause, but the second he started to sing he washed him away entirely. It was nothing like the shrieking light voices of the women or dark baritone rumble of a man's voice. The only thing he could compare the sound to was to the morning song of a nightingale. 

 

Yifan found himself getting lost in the performance, the passion the boy sang with and how he stuck out from the crowd of cheeky singers before him. The glint in his eyes as he moved his hands to the song in a stand still dance. It was captivating, and Yifan was willing to be captured. Somewhere in the song their eyes met each other and then he went quiet, eyes never leaving him as he accepted the applause from the men in the club. 

 

It was Yixing who pulled him back out of it with a hand to his shoulder and a laugh. “Enjoying the song? Or have you just had one too many drinks? You were staring at that boy as if you wanted him down in your lap more than on the stage.” Rolling his eyes Yifan swallowed down the last of his whiskey in one go. 

 

“Maybe the long travel finally got to me, I might retire for the night. After all it's a long walk to my house from here. Until next time, Zhang.” They nodded at each other and Yifan bid farewell to the rest of the officers and higher ranking soldiers before walking out in the crisp night air. A soft breeze tousled his hair and he swung the navy blue jacket over his shoulders then paused to pull out a hand rolled cigarette and lit it with a match. Expertidly holding a hand in way of the wind not to put the flame out as he breathed in the tobacco smoke. 

 

Closing his eyes for a second he let all the events melt in. Five years really felt long when the initial battle was over in less than two weeks. It had been so long since he last laid in his own bed, took a proper bath. His whole body shuddered at the mere thought of it and he opened his eyes again, taking in the dark night. He'd been staring at the same sky just on different land for so long. 

 

Exhaling slowly Yifan began his long walk back home, the ever busy streets spotted with common folk giving him respectful bows when he passed and some drunken men even singing a common victory song at the top of their lungs. The whole country was buzzing with pride and excitement for their achievements. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Months passed since they had ventured back home, China had begun to establish some sort of rules over the Korean people even if rebel groups had surfaced, as expected. But they did not worry much of them, a group of rebels couldn’t overthrow the Chinese army. Yifan had heard rumours of being promoted and waited patiently while doing whatever paperwork and training the general gave him.

 

Life wasn’t quite as exciting after the initial happiness and pride settled down into responsibilities and hard work to do. However there were weeks that were empty where he’d simply go out to shabby bars for a cheap drink, read a book at home or simply meditate and tidying up in his zen garden. Today was one of those days. He had cleaned his entire house until late evening when he decided he deserve a drink. Preferably a glass of whiskey. 

 

Yifan couldn’t complain however, five years away from home? He deserved a break and to let himself go. After brushing through his hair with his fingers to push it back with some grecy gel Yifan washed off his hands before buttoning up his white cotton shirt, leaving the three first buttons open. Grabbing his worn out leather wallet he placed it in his pocket as well as his rolled cigarettes and match box.

 

Humming on a quiet song he left his house, greeting his neighbours with a nod as he passed them on his way to the pub he had decided to go to. It wasn’t a fancy place, but they did have live music which he greatly appreciated. The shoes echoed along the houses as he walked down the streets, already hearing the music from the cellar closest to his house.

 

Greeting the guard at the door Yifan walked down the stairs and was met by the warm light of oil lamps set on every table and a large chandelier in the center, stearin dripping down on the dark wooden floor. Smoke filled the room, leaving a gentle fog along the ceiling. Making a beeline to the bar Yifan set a order for a glass of whiskey, handing the bartender a few coins.

 

Taking a seat in one of the couchined wooden chairs in the middle of the room Yifan took a sip of the whiskey and let out a pleased sigh. He hadn’t had a drink in a while now and the familiar burn going down his throat felt good. Absentmindedly Yifan tapped a foot along to the music, looking up to the band only to hear a voice he was sure he’d heard before. 

 

The corners of his lips tugged into a small smile as he saw the young man on the stage that had been there when they celebrated their won battle once they got home. However he wasn’t wearing a plain suit, instead, a blue changshan tucked into a pair of flowy white pants and a white robe reaching his mid thigh. What caught his eye however was the pearl and rhinestone decorated headband placed on his head with two tassels framing his face. 

 

Yifan could’t tear his eyes off of him and just like that night those months ago their eyes met and something like recognition flashed across his face and eyes widened slightly, but kept singing in that beautiful voice of his. Taking a sip of his whiskey he enjoyed the show and stand still dancing on stage as the band played song after song.

 

Two empty whiskey glasses decorated his table along with a plate to put out his cigarette. Watching the young man with hooded eyes he soon finished and exited the small stage and Yifan saw him simply walk up to the bar from the corner of his eyes. Lighting a new cigarette with his matches the colonel stood up from his chair and walked up to the bar, standing next to the young man.

 

“A whiskey and a glass of rice wine for the young singer.” Yifan told the bartender who nodded and let his eyes shift from him to the younger man who just had been about to order. “I hope you don’t mind wine.”

 

“I’d prefer a bee’s knees but wine always goes down does it not?” The young man smiled up at him and Yifan felt his breath catch in his throat as he got to take a closer look at the younger. He was breathtakingly beautiful. “My name is Junmyeon.”

 

_ Junmyeon _ .

 

Smiling as he took his glass of whiskey Yifan nodded. “Junmyeon, a beautiful name to match to a beautiful face.” Lowering his cigarette from his lips Yifan let smoke slither out of his mouth and took a sip of the dark liquor. “Mind sitting down with me, Junmyeon?” The way his name rolled of his lips felt right and he smiled in triumph as the younger man took his glass and nodded in agreement.

 

“May I ask for your name then stranger?” Pulling out the chair for Junmyeon Yifan let him sit down and take a sip of his rice wine before taking a seat himself, watching as the other crossed his legs towards him. “I think it’s only fair since you know mine now.”

 

“Wu Yifan.” He said around his cigarette, the smoke breathed out through his nose and Junmyeon perked up. “As in colonel Wu Yifan?” The latter nodded and grinned as the younger fixed his robe and headband. “I had no idea that a country’s hero would be visiting such a shabby place. And buying a simple entertainer a drink.”

 

“Simple? You don’t give yourself enough credit darling. Wasn’t it you who sang at the bar in town when we had returned?” Junmyeon nodded in affirmation, smiling a little around the edge of his glass. “Your voice is mesmerizing. I’m glad I got to hear it again.”

 

Yifan noticed there was a mole over his plush top lip now when they sat closer to the oil lamp and his lashes were long and thick. If his eyes weren’t deceiving him he might think that his cheeks had been painted a pretty pink, or perhaps he’d made the young man blush. “You can’t be older than twenty five. So tell me.”

 

“Oh, I’m twenty two, just turned actually!” He said excitedly and the dazzling smile that made his eyes turn into crescents and it made Yifan take a deep breath of his cigarette. How could one man behold so much beauty? He must be unreal. “But I didn’t get to celebrate much since I was working. But I love singing so I don’t mind, plus they made me a tart and even gave me a bottle of japanese rice wine!”

 

“Well, happy late birthday. I guess the drink would be considered a birthday gift. Was it now in June?” The jewels of the tassels shifted in all colours as he shook his head no, leaning forward to rest his chin in his curled up palm with a wide smile.

 

“Late May actually, but close Colonel.” Eyes seeking over the white shirt and the tan skin showing through the crack and down to the black pants it was tucked into. Yifan leaned back and opened his legs just slightly, tilting his head to the side. “Am I allowed to ask you about your age?”

 

“Why would you not be? I may be in the military but I’m human too, you can see me as an equal in this bar Junmyeon.” The latter seemed to think for a while, eyes unfocused as they stared down at his black dress shoes before lifting his head.

 

“Well, I’m a simple man, you’re a hero. We aren’t equals since I’m scraping together rent from singing while you live a life of luxury for bringing this country forward.” As much as Yifan loved to be praised it felt wrong as he thought of the things that Junmyeon might’ve done to get money enough to get a place to stay. Or even getting these gigs.

 

“But to answer your question, I’m thirty as of last year but I still got some time until it’s my day.” A third empty glass joined the other two on the table and he put out his cigarette, eyes focused on the way Junmyeon’s tongue collecting a drop from his bottom lip. The wine glass, that too empty now, was set down on the dark table and Junmyeon un crossed his legs.

 

“Where do you live Junmyeon.” The younger perked up, eyes glossy from the alcohol and lips slightly flushed a darker pink. “About half an hour away from here by foot. The outer parts of the district.” Yifan knew about the outer districts, a lot of people like Junmyeon lived there. People with dreams to make it big, along with criminals and other sketchy people.

 

“That seems like a long journey at this late hour. Perhaps you’d like to come back home with me for the night?” With a brow raised, calculating how the younger would react and smirked when he saw the tips of his ears turn red. It had been well received and he nodded towards the door. “We should head back before the sun rises don’t you think.”

 

Junmyeon brushed some dark hair from his eyes before nodding, eyes looking almost dangerous in the light emitted from the lamp and it only excited Yifan even more as they stood up to leave the establishment. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Yifan sat on the small balcony with view over his garden, the scales of the koi fish in the pond reflecting the first rays of the morning sun as it peeked over his house. He could hear Junmyeon singing inside, he had let him lend his bathtub to wash off after their nightly activities. The soft velvet sound of his voice melted together with the birds harmonizing in the trees, seemingly singing the same song. 

 

Closing his eyes Yifan lifted the cup to his lips and took a sip of the green tea as he enjoyed a calm morning. It took some time but soon the sound of bare feet over wooden floor approached the balcony and Yifan opened his eyes slowly, then turned his head to look at the younger who stood in the doorway, holding onto the sliding door. 

 

A smile spread over his lips as their eyes met and Yifan gestured for him to sit next to him and put his cup away to pour Junmyeon a cup as well. “Was the bath pleasant?” Junmyeon walked around him, a bit of a limp in his step, and sat down, bowing his head as a thank you for pouring his tea. “And I see you found the clothes I laid out for you.”

 

It was just a simple beige robe, it was too big for Junmyeon but it had to do for this time being. And the way it slipped down his shoulder to show off the marks he had left last night, claiming Junmyeon as his, were on full display each time it shifted. “Yes, I enjoyed it very much. You didn't need to put oils in it, or lend me it to wash my hair.”

 

“I did. It's hospitality, and a proper way to treat someone you've shared your bed with. I don't see you as some wear and tear toy. It's the least I could do after yesterday Junmyeon, don't think of it too much.” The other nodded a little and lifted the cup to his lips and carefully sipped. His black hair was still wet and drops fell from the tips and onto the wooden floor as well as the robes, leaving a dark shadow. 

 

For a while the both of them enjoyed the early morning and the brewed tea, the wind chime in bamboo and bells tinkling calmly along with the breeze. Yifan watched the younger man lean back, eyes closed and tea cup resting in his hands. He’d never be able to understand how every time he looked at the younger man he seemed to find him more and more beautiful. 

 

“Your garden is beautiful Yifan, it must be serene living like this. Away from the loud city and dirt.” There was something like longing in his voice, something sad that made Yifan feel uneasy. He didn't like the fact that a gem like Junmyeon had to live in the slums, walking home in the wee hours of the morning all by himself surrounded by drunk men. Like letting a bird with a broken wing walk through a alley of hungry stray cats. 

 

It struck Yifan in the heart that this was perhaps the closest Junmyeon would ever come to a calm life. The younger mentioned yesterday of the fights in the bars, the men stalking him and the robberies. Even mentions of gang activity which he frowned at. This little taste of looking over the geometric garden in the early morning sun could be his first time not waking up to a roof leaking water into a bucket next to the foot of his bed and people yelling outside. 

 

Junmyeon lowered his head and opened his eyes to take a sip of his tea, running a thumb along the golden design on the porcelain. “It's so beautiful.” Then turning back to look at the colonel who felt his breath catch by the way the sun made his cheekbones glow almost like gold. 

 

“It doesn't have to be the last.” The way that Junmyeon seemed to straighten his back, lips falling open just slightly and his eyes widening he could tell he hadn't expected that. “Like I said. I don't want you to be a wear and tear toy. I'd like to learn more about you. You've intrigued me Junmyeon, and I hope that you would like to meet again rather soon.”

 

Junmyeon’s hands trembled slightly and Yifan watched him place the cup onto the table gingerly before bowing his head “I'd love to meet you again. However, I'm confused as of why your interest landed on me. There's nothing special about me.”

 

“You sell yourself short, Junmyeon.” How he loved the sound of his name, how good it felt to word it out and watch the boy possessing the name light up. “In a lovers eye is the foremost beauty.” To see Junmyeon’s lips pull into a shadow of a smile made him feel something that was foreign to him, but he liked it. Silence settled between them once again and only the birds song filed the cool morning air. 

 

Yifan stood up and Junmyeon placed his cup on the table and stood up as well, shifting the robes into place and looked up at the other. Lifting a hand he gently cupped the younger’s cheek and rubbed his thumb over his cheek bone. “When can I see you again?” He asked as his hand ran further up to run through the still somewhat wet hair.

 

He leaned into his hand carefully and Yifan watched his lashes flutter closed. “I work wednesday to Sunday, it’s very popular to have live music nowadays, a small luxury during war times I suppose. But I hope it’ll be soon and you know where to find me.” Junmyeon tucked hair behind his ear, a few strands staying there, some fell back forward. 

 

“I do.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Yifan got called back to the town house just a few days after his night with Junmyeon and suddenly it wasn’t as exciting discussing the future of the Korean peninsula. Tapping his fingers against the table he looked out the window, watching the wind rattle the leaves in the trees gently. He had been here for three days trying to make progress and the days were starting to feel longer. They had come some way but they were still far from a perfect idea and yifan wouldn’t be sitting in here with the rest if he hadn’t put a bullet through the last emperor’s head he would just go back to his army, simply teaching new recruits and mourning their losses. 

 

“Hey, Wu, are you listening.” The general muttered and Yifan nodded tiredly and cracked his neck, feeling some tension leave his body. “Like I was saying. We have records from the temple in Korea telling us that Choi Siwon had two more sons that were not present during the take over of the Korean Empire. We need to find them urgently, I will not have the successors come back to Korea and gain hope back to the people and fight back. I’ve assigned captain Lu Han and a few of his selected men to hound them out and put a end to the royal line.”

 

If he’d be honest he didn’t believe the two lost sons of emperor Choi Siwon was going to try turn the people against them. As it sounded to him, one of them was around fifteen and  the other had been gone for a while already before the war, probably shipped off to avoid the fights with his younger brother while the last two was left to fight for their country. But better be safe than sorry. Rubbing his sore neck all he could imagine was Junmyeon’s soft hands laced behind his neck as he kissed behind his ear.

 

Thank god he’d be heading back home tomorrow, he longed to see Junmeyon again, hear him sing and watch him smile and giggle. He was intriguing and something about his brown eyes and secretive smiles and he missed him strangely enough. 

 

Once the meeting was finally over Yifan took his jacket off and washed his face off in the small motel that the visitors stayed in when someone knocked at his door. Opening it up he was met by a familiar face. “Yixing, I didn’t expect you to be here as well. I didn’t see you at the meeting.”

 

“No I’m here to help Lu Han with his investigation, so the time with my family was short lived for now since I’m going back to Korea, or did they decide a new name for them? I know it was discussed on the journey back home but since you’re around the higher ups maybe you know.”

 

“I believe that they decided on keeping Korea but it’s no longer it’s own empire so that will be removed. They’ll announce it in a few months once things are more settled I believe, but a lot can change in that time.” Yixing nodded in agreement and pushed his gloved hands into his pockets. 

 

“Well, I came by to see if you were up for taking a glass or perhaps eat something. I know you're going back soon so I want to spend a little time before you go back home.” Yifan told him to come in while he gathered a few things and his comrade did so patiently, lightly talking about his child and how it strange it felt he'd miss perhaps another year of his childhood. 

 

Then he was asked when he might get his own wife and kids and Yifan just shrugged and said they'd have to wait and see. Even though Yifan was well aware he would probably never search for a wife, having kids was something he might want, but he'd never be able to be with a woman like that. 

 

Soon enough they were out the door and walking the streets in search for a bar or restaurant. In the end they settled on a small rather empty spot not far from the town house and ordered their meals. “So what are your leads on the lost princes of Korea?” Leaning back in the hand carved wooden chair Yifan watched Yixing roll his eyes.

 

“Way too little to be described as a lead...all we know is that they existed, were not sure if they're even alive. They could've been casualties in the war without us even knowing who we killed. But we found some letters that indicate they may be on Jeju island dated back to when we believe the youngest of them were sent of for studies with relatives.”

 

“He shouldn’t be much older than twenty Lu Han believes, since he was about ten when he was sent away and the conflicts started just a year or two later according to his timeline at least. But he's a great tactician and investigator so I think he knows what he's talking about.”

 

“I'm sure he'll figure it out, however I do have to say I'm not entirely sure if it's even worthy wasting time on this. It's too high of a chance they're already dead. I understand they're paranoid but we'd be able to end a rebellion and revolution before it's start. It's not like they'd learn about military tactics. Their father sent them off for a reason, which probably was to keep them away from war and going to the military to fight.”

 

“I agree, I rather be home with my family but they must have some reasoning for this paranoia. Maybe one of them was a military genius.” Yifan chuckled and shook his head, nodding a quick thank you to the waiter bringing them their food. 

 

“Two kids no older than 15 being military generals sounds more unlikely than Huang Zitao’s encounter with that dragon.” Both of them broke into laughter at the expense of their drunken friend who'd told a story of meeting a dragon during their second year out in battle. 

 

“I think you're right. But I just want this over with so I can get back to my kid, it's not supposed to take more than a year or so and I'm arable to go back home a few days a week. Plus, we both are guilty to kissing the general’s ass to climb this ladder.”

 

Yifan shrugged and chuckled, agreeing to the statement of course. “Good thing you don't miss your kids growth too much.”

 

“Yea….and what about you? You got a lady at home now? You seem like you're also longing to go back home. Are you courting someone?” Yixing had always been hoping for him to start a family of his own,  he’d talk a lot about how he wants to have their kids become friends. While yes, it was very cute to imagine their little kids running after one other giggling he knew it wouldn’t happen.

 

Sure, he could easily find a woman willing to marry him and get kids with him, someone who could work as a apron. But it made him think of how she’d be hurt if she found out that her life wasn’t real and maybe if he’d go further with Junmyeon, he’d be unsupportive of that life as well, to be “the other woman”.

 

“Not really Yixing. I just find this meeting a little unnecessary to attend and I bought oils for my tub before leaving and I’m looking forward to a steaming bath with lavender oil.” Offering a smile to the other he dug into the food placed down in front of him, his mind lingering back home to where Junmyeon was. He wondered if he was preparing for his night of singing his little heart out for anyone willing to listen to him.

 

Yixing seemed to notice how he was lost in thought with a smile on his lips as they enjoyed their meal, but he didn’t comment on it further. Yifan would tell him when he was ready if there was someone in his life.

 

A glass of whiskey and 3 hours later they called it a night and Yifan went back to his room only to immediately fall asleep, dreaming of soft pale skin, pink plush lips and a voice clear like a stream of water running through the forest.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The same day that he came back home Yifan went out to find Junmyeon. Dressing in simple day clothes he also grabbed a umbrella since it was a rainy day and Yifan wondered if it was already that time of year. But he didn’t mind, his balcony had a ceiling and sitting there listening to the drops and even thunderstorms was serene. Perhaps Junmyeon would like it too. 

 

Walking down to the bar he could already hear him sing and as he stopped at the end of the stairs to leave his wet umbrella Yifan watched him on stage in simple white pants and a matching shirt decorated with jade embroidery around the hems and neck. Their eyes met and the smile that formed on Junmyeon’s lips made Yifan’s stomach stir and he found a free table close to the stage where he simply sat and waited without buying himself a drink. Junmyeon would be done in maybe a hour so he didn’t feel the need to fill that time with alcohol.

 

Junmyeon went on to sing a sleazy love song, his hands moving with his voice as if painting landscapes in the air, telling a story through his song and dance. How not everyone were unable to tear their eyes away from him. Eyes followed Junmyeon as he stepped down from the stage and grinned as he sat next to him. “Fancy seeing you again colonel Wu. It’s been some time.”

 

“I told you to call me Yifan. I’m not at work and I don’t want to think about that either.” Yifan smiled and motioned for them to leave. Junmyeon smiled and happily followed, joining the other under his umbrella to avoid the downpour. 

 

“I know you said you didn't want to talk about work but, how was it all? You seemed very reluctant to leave.” Junmyeon laced one arm around the one Yifan had bent to hold the umbrella over them once they got closer to his house. 

 

“I've been gone from home for years so I looked forward to stay here for a while, preferably with you.” Looking down to the other he gave him a warm smile and the younger grinned back. “Plus, the meeting was unnecessary, didn't quite enjoy my stay even though I met a friend there.”

 

“Ah, well. I'm here to take your mind off of those things now!” Junmyeon hummed and tightened his hand just a little around Yifan’s sleeve as they got closer to his house. The jewelry the younger wore jingled gently with each step and it seemed to make the grey dark evening seem a little lighter.

 

As entering his house Yifan carefully closed the sliding door and kicked his shoes off. “Would you like a cup of tea?” Junmyeon smiled and nodded, shaking some water off his hair and clothes, taking of the jacket he wore and followed into the kitchen. It was dark still and Yifan easily moved around the familiar space, filling up a kettle before placing it on the stove and turned on the gas. Lighting it up with a match Yifan then lit a few candles to give some light to the room and Junmyeon looked through the tea selection he had today and picked the little tin box of simple green tea with rose.

 

“Hmm, you want to slip into something more comfortable?” Yifan asked as he ran a hand over the stiff fabric of the shirt he wore and sighed, hands lingering to touch his warm skin. Junmyeon nodded and shifted a little closer. “Go up to my room and find something to wear, I’ll finish up with the tea for us.”

 

“Okay.” Walking off Yifan watched him disappear up the stairs to his room and he turned the gas down and removed the kettle, turning it off as he poured in some of the tea and let it sit, stirring it around gently and letting it sit. He could hear Junmyeon move upstairs and soon the wooden floor creaked as he walked back down. 

 

Taking two cups as Junmyeon came up to wrap his arms around his waist he chuckled quietly and placed one hand over his smaller ones. “Tea’s done, do you want to watch the rain while drinking it?” Turning around his eyes laid on the beautiful young man looking up at him and he ran a hand over the dark brown hair. He’d picked one of his simple linen shirts and as it seemed, no pants.

 

“I’d like that, I think I heard the rumble of a thunderstorm rolling in when I was upstairs.” Leaning down to kiss his temple Yifan nodded and turned back around to pour up their tea in the cups. Taking both in his hand he nodded his head up. “Let’s get up on the balcony then, you know the way.”

 

Junmyeon knew how to get around rather well, after all he’d been here a few times already and even if most that time had been spent in his room he knew his way around the house well enough. Once out on the balcony he placed the cups down and Junmyeon sat in his usual spot and Yifan his. Now when outside they both could hear the thunder getting closer and Junmyeon looked up at the violent dark skies with a smile.

 

“You’re so lucky to live like this. Your house doesn’t leak either which is a plus. I had to place out some pots and vases before heading out to work but they’ll probably be overfilled by tomorrow.” Yifan hummed, he’d never been to his house but he had walked past the district Junmyeon lived in and it didn’t look to be greatly built houses.

 

“And you know that you’re more than free to be here during colder days and nights, your apartment doesn’t seem to be able to hold warmth and I wouldn’t want you to freeze to death.” Sipping the tea the younger shrugged, pulling his knees up to his chest and looking over to the colonel.

 

“But wouldn’t it be a waste to spend my hard earned money on a house I won’t spend time in?” The gentle smile on his lips made Yifan melt, he was simply enchanting even in simple clothes. Perhaps he was a fallen angel, it’d explain his heavenly voice as well.

 

“Perhaps so…” Yifan checked the temperature of the tea with his lips before taking a sip and licking over his lips. “But the invitation is there, I want you to know that.”

 

They had gotten closer the past months they had spent time together, getting to know one another on a deeper level than just physical. Yifan wondered if maybe they could go further than just have Junmyeon be a frequent visitor in his bed, he’d grown to like the younger and enjoyed his company. Yifan had a crush on a boy when he was younger as well, but he knew he had to keep that part of himself private. However, Junmyeon might be the first person he could fall in love with. But if he was going to be honest he might already be in love.

 

Junmyeon had told him about his past, how he was a orphan who moved from the border to the Korean Empire when the war started and settled down to do what he loved here, closer to the city. Which explained his not so traditional Chinese name. He had siblings but once their parents died they got seperated on the streets and he wasn’t sure where they were but he hoped they were doing well. 

 

His three biggest wishes were to meet his siblings one day, to live comfortably in a house with a big garden and to see some sort of peace between the two nations. Often he'd wonder aloud how it would've been if he was born into a different family. 

 

He hated the cold and loved early summer mornings. They reminded him of his childhood and his siblings, how they’d have breakfast in the garden in the sun on clear days, enjoying the warmth the sun provided and getting some color.

 

Yifan found him so gentle and loving. He’d been through a hard life and still kept fighting and was open to new people to meet and love. So considerate and even if his life wasn’t the best, he seemed to be happy either way.

 

Placing his empty cup down alongside Junmyeon’s the colonel stood up and joined the younger who had stood up and looked out on the garden. The sleeves were rolled up as Junmyeon rested his arms on the wet wooden rail and his head leaned in his hand. Yifan walked up behind him and placed a kiss against his neck, arms wrapping around his waist loosely. 

 

“What about you stay the weekend. You're not working right?” Junmyeon leaned his head back against his shoulder, reaching his left hand back to brush over the short strands on his neck. 

 

“I'm not.” The elder leaned in to press butterfly kisses along his neck up to his ear. Hands gently massaging his lower back with his thumbs, watching Junmyeon's eyes flutter shut and lips parting to let out a small moan. 

 

“Then please stay.” Yifan pulled away slightly to let Junmyeon turn around in his arms and all he did was nod before wrapping his arms around his neck. Their lips easily met midway and slowly he backed the young singer against the rail. It felt natural, like Junmyeon was made to be with him, for him to hold and love. 

 

Junmyeon leaned into him, hands gripping at his hair and shirt as the kisses slowly got deeper. Pulling away to take a few deep needed breaths Yifan kissed his way down along his jaw to his neck, gracing his teeth over the nape. He could feel the shudder and then how he pressed up against him. “Take me….take me inside.”

 

Placing his hands under Junmyeon's thighs he kissed his cheek and proceeded to easily pick him up. Feeling the others hardening dick against his abdomen Yifan groaned quietly in the back of his throat as he walked them back inside. Outside the thunder continued to rumble as he placed the younger down on the large wooden bed. 

 

The rain falling heavily outside set a mysterious atmosphere along with the lightning strikes. But Yifan didn't focus on that, all he could see was Junmyeon and his glossed over eyes and red kissed lips parted. 

 

Crawling up between his spread legs the elder placed his hands under the big button up shirt and slowly ran his hands up to his chest. Giving Junmyeon a sultry look he then leaned down to kiss his stomach, watching as he arched his back with a whimper. With the second kiss he felt those plush thighs tightening around him. 

 

Slowly kissing up to his chest Yifan let his thumbs roll Junmyeon's perky nipples as his hips ground down into the youngers. “You're so beautiful.” Yifan whispered before moving to his left nipple and wrapped his mouth around it, tongue flicking over it before sucking, his hand pinched and tugged gently at his right. The sounds Junmyeon let out was music to his ears, the high pitched moans and whines as he writhed underneath him. 

 

Yifan pulled away after a few minutes of teasing, eyes locking together as his fingers undid the buttons of the shirt Junmyeon wore, revealing unmarked skin all over again. A blank canvas to paint in beautiful colors. 

 

“You have to get naked too.” The younger giggled, a little breathless, as he shrugged out of the shirt and smiled. His hand reached out to undo the first button he reached and Yifan helped him with the rest. “You look very handsome in your attire but like this I'd prefer you without them..”

 

“Of course.” Yifan mumbled with a grin and removed his shirt and pants, leaving them both in their underwear. “Is this more fair?” Junmyeon just nodded, a little breathless as he reached out to grace his fingers over the bulge. 

 

“I want you…” The slight despair in his voice made Yifan lean down to press their lips together over and over as one of his hands went down the front of the white cotton boxers. 

  
  
  
  
  


Yifan blinked awake, eyes falling on the man curled up in his arms. His lips in a small pout as he slept, dark eyelashes flickering just slightly. Carefully pulling him closer Yifan placed a kiss against the back of his neck, noting the clear marks he left on his shoulder and collarbones. Smiling for himself the colonel began running his hands through his silky hair, it smelled like rose from the oils he'd given him. 

 

Junmyeon whined quietly in his sleep before turning over, snuggling into Yifan's chest and the elder chuckled as he wrapped his arms around him. “You're so beautiful even like this.” He murmured against the top of his head, pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

 

He wished that it could be like this every morning when waking up. Simply watching the younger stir awake and smiling up at him. Yifan let out a sigh as his fingers painted patterns on the small of his back. 

 

About thirty minutes later Junmyeon woke slowly, letting out a quiet whine he stretched and smiled tiredly. Yifan couldn't take his eyes off of him. “Slept well?” He asked as the younger simply snuggled closer as he nodded. 

 

“Much nicer and warmer than my own apartment.” Junmyeon's voice was raspy with sleep still. His arms lifted to wrap around Yifan's neck as they cuddled in the early morning while the sun raised after a stormy night. 

 

“How do you feel? You hurting anywhere?” 

 

“Not more than normal. I'm fine Yifan. But thank you for your concerns.” The younger smiled up at him and lifted himself to his elbows. “You worry a lot for someone who's fought in war.”

 

“That's very different. Potentially hurting you and fighting in a well calculated war isn't the same.” Yifan's eyes followed Junmyeon's hand as it moved under the pillow and he lifted his own hand to caress his cheek. 

 

“Don't you hurt people all the time?” The question did shock him slightly, making his hand stop before his thumb rubbed circles onto his cheek. 

 

“I wouldn't say all the time… but I'm doing my job, for our country. It's not like I enjoy or take pleasure in hurting or killing people. But it's needed. It's, as morbid as it sound, what I'm good at.” Yifan sighed audibly, running gentle fingers along the warm cheek of his lover. “That doesn't mean I want you to hurt after something that's supposed to be pleasurable.”

 

Junmyeon simply looked down and nodded, shifting a little closer. “It must be difficult. But, if you don't want to do it...then why are you still in the army.”

 

“My father was a admiral and I suppose I'm trying to make him proud. Even if he's passed. And quitting the army just because would be almost cowardly. It's either returning home old and wounded or dead if you don't want to be viewed as a coward and honorless.”

 

“I don't like war. I don't understand it, and I don't want you to return home  _ dead _ just to avoid fighting in one.” Junmyeon sighed and leaned into the gentle touches before sitting up on his knees. Yifan followed, the blanket slipping down his chest to pool around his waist as he reached out to cup his cheek. 

 

“Were not at war now, are we? It'll be fine.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Yifan had invited Junmyeon over for dinner since he didn't feel comfortable going out considering their sexuality. Plus they could speak more freely at his home. They'd known each other for almost a year now, he'd want to consider them more than just lovers but they hadn't had that type of talk yet. Maybe they'd never get to that, but Yifan didn't mind as long as he was allowed to love him. 

 

There was a gentle knock on the door and Yifan lit up as he wiped his hands on a towel to get the door. Outside stood Junmyeon with a smile on his face and wearing simple black pants with a sapphire blue shirt with silver embroidery around the collar. In the moonlight shining down on him Junmyeon looked ethereal. 

 

“Aren't you cold?” Stepping to the side to let Junmyeon in and the younger just shook his head and carefully took of his shoes to slip his feet into the pair of silk slippers Yifan had bought him a few months ago. 

 

“Not as long as I'm on my way here I won't be cold.” As soon as Yifan had closed the door Junmyeon stood on his toes and kissed the colonel.  “Thank you for inviting me over.” 

 

“I just wish that we could've been outside on a dinner instead of here. But I'm happy that you like my house and that you feel comfortable here.” They walked into the kitchen, only lit by a few candles and the moon peeking in between the white curtains. 

 

On the counter the bottle of rice wine stood, just opened before Junmyeon arrived and Yifan poured a glass each to them. “I know you said you liked fruity drinks but I don’t know how to make those dinks so I hope sweet rice wine is good enough for you.”

 

“Of course, like I said it’s just a preference. But I can gladly settle for this.” 

 

“It’s been a while...a week right? How’ve you been? It’s getting colder again, it’s december soon.”

 

Yifan was worried about his lovers bad living space, a half broken window, no fireplace or running water. No heat at all. Lat year he had bunched up in several layers just to be able to sleep during the night. He feared maybe one day he’d freeze to death and not show up.

 

“Yeah, it’s getting colder really quick this year. I haven’t even had the time to take the blankets and all my knits out. But I’m getting to it, I’m just trying to work hard, they cut my pay with 9 yuan so I can’t get new candles this month.”

 

“I’ll give you some, I have plenty Junmyeon. You know you can just ask me for anything...I want to help you.”

 

Junmyeon simply kept quiet for a minute, looking down at his glass of wine. “But I don’t want to ask for too much. It makes me feel strange having to ask for your money and help. Even if it’s just a wax candle, Yifan. I don’t want to feel like I’m in debt to you.”

 

“Junmyeon,” Yifan sighed gently. “You’re not in debt to me. I don’t have a ulterior motive when it comes to helping you. I’m doing this because I love you.” He’d never said it out loud before, not to Junmyeon. Never had he felt like this before. Heart beating hard in his chest simply looking at the younger.

 

“You-you love me?” Yifan smiled as his voice broke, obviously shocked and surprised with his statement and confession. Those beautiful deep eyes he’d fallen for teared up before finally welling over. He set the wine glass on the counter and Yifan cupped his cheeks.

 

“Of course I do, I thought you would’ve noticed.” Wiping away the tears gently with his thumbs he leaned in to kiss his forehead. “Don’t cry my song bird.” 

 

Junmyeon placed his glas on the counter along with Yifan’s as he stepped closer and the latter wrapped his arms around the younger, letting his shirt be stained with tears. For a while they stayed like that, Yifan didn’t want to rush Junmyeon and simply caressed his back and kissed his head until he pulled away. “I can’t remember the last time someone old me those words. I’m not even sure I have heard them spoken to me.”

 

“In that case I’m more than happy to tell you again if you want me to.” Junmyeon wiped his own eyes and nodded, lifting his head to look at Yifan. “I love you, Junmyeon.” No tears fell the second time and Yifan kissed his cheek. “Let’s have dinner before it gets cold.” 

 

Junmyeon simply giggled and nodded, letting Yifan lead him to the table where the table was set with several candles in the middle and plates with noodle soup. “I made the it all from scratch myself.” He said proudly, it took hours to boil the broth and his large rough hands had a hard time rolling noodles himself but it was worth it to impress. 

 

“Wow.” Was the slightly breathless reply when they sat down across each other of the small dining table. “You’re an amazing cook so I can’t wait to taste it. I’ve looked forward to this the whole week.” 

 

“You don’t have to wait longer.” They dug in and Yifan didn’t hear a end to the praise for his cooking as Junmyeon chewed on the noodles and slightly charred duck. “I’m thinking of growing some of my own crop, it would be idyllic to have my own greens to cook with. I’m going to try this spring.”

 

“You sound more and more of a farmer than a soldier when you speak.” Junmyeon laughed and ate his last piece of duck, finishing his bowl and drinking from his second glass of wine. “I’ve always wanted to just get a farm.”

 

“If I’d run away from the army would you come with me and start up a farm far away from here. Out in the country with a rice farm and goats?” Yifan had finished long ago and stood up to collect the dishes and Junmyeon followed him as he placed them in the sink. 

 

“Yes. You know I would.” Smiling carefully while rinsing out the bowls Yifan nodded and turned to him.

 

“Maybe one day. I’ll give you the heads up.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Junmyeon stayed the night as well. Yifan read a book out loud that they had read together and stopped once Junmyeon fell asleep in his arms on the bed and he tucked him in and whispered “I love you” before carefully cuddling up with him.

 

Waking up to a chilly room and snow falling down gently outside, pulling Junmyeon a bit closer he accidentally woke him up, hearing a raspy whine in response. The younger blinked twice before pressing back, seeking warmth. 

 

“Morning.” Yifan whispered, hand finding Junmyeon’s and lacing their fingers together as he placed a kiss behind the back of his ear. “Slept well?”

 

“Mhm. It’s so much different sleeping under a shared duvet. It’s nice and warm here with you. In more ways than one.” Yifan couldn’t agree more. He’d not shared his bed with many in his life but having Junmyeon wrapped up with him filled him with a warmth he was sure only the performer could give. Wishing they could stay like this forever.

 

Shifting so that they were facing each other the younger smiled up at him and Yifan swore his heart skipped a beat. His cheeks flushed from sleep, eyes still glossy and hair messy. “I wonder what village i saved in my past life to get to hold you in my arms.” 

 

“Am I only worth a village for you?” The pout wasn’t serious, though they both already knew that the answer was no. To Yifan he was worth more than the stars in the sky. 

 

“Stop complaining while I’m showing you affection or I’ll force you to get up and do a military workout before breakfast.” He scolded jokingly and chuckled, leaning down to press their lips together in a simple kiss. “Because I want to stay in a little longer.”

 

“Then I’ll keep quiet.” Junmyeon giggled and tucked his head under Yifan’s chin, closing his eyes once again as the colonel ran his hand along his back. 

 

Yifan thought about yesterday's conversation as his lover calmly laid next to him. Junmyeon had mentioned he didn’t have anyone close before he met Yifan. No friends he’d talk to regularly. The closest he got to a friend was the pianist at the bar, a girl named  Qian  who was doing gigs on the side of her studies to become a doctor.

 

More often than not he’d hear his neighbours fight or there would be comotion on the streets that could end up in someone getting killed. Considering the conflicts between two gangs that had risen there it was dangerous to simply walk the streets. Junmyeon had been approached by a man from one of the gangs that had tried recruiting him but he politely declined and just hoped it wouldn’t end up getting him killed. But he’d survived this far.

 

The apartment itself was on the brink of collapse where it stood. Cracks in the walls and ceiling, water dripping every spring when the snow thawed or rain hit them. And of course no running water or warmth. He told him yesterday he didn’t actually have much. It wasn’t like he had space to decorate but he slept on a futon on the cold floor, had a table with a chair and a simple kitchen that he couldn’t pay the gas for and his two bags with his clothes. 

 

He had so little yet he was so optimistic about singing he didn’t mind the situation. Yifan admired that in him. Not even wanting to ask for help, simply working for himself. But at the same time he wanted to help, because after all, Yifan loved him. 

 

Junmyeon stirred, soft gentle lips pressing against his collarbone before kissing his jaw. “Did you really mean it?” He whispered, arm wrapping over his shoulder.

 

“Mean what? That I’d make you do a military work out in the morning?” In response he got a delightful laugh and Yifan smiled at the sound. It sounded so light and gentle, just like when he’d sing. 

 

“No, that you love me.” Yifan shifted so that they were facing one another, stroking some dark strands from his eyes as their eyes locked. Resting his hand on the back of his head Junmyeon licked his lips.

 

“I do. I really do. Don’t doubt my words for a second.  I’d never lie to you .” The younger smiled a little before averting his eyes down as if to think of the words and Yifan took that moment to kiss his forehead. “Then, my love, are you in the mood for breakfast?”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He hadn’t seen Junmyeon in a while to his disappointment, but he had seen him at the bad a week ago and had a few drinks with him but he didn’t have time to come over that night. Yifan hoped that nothing was wrong. 

 

Dipping his head under the surface of his bath Yifan rubbed his face and then broke the surface again. The smell of the rosemary oil infused warm bath calmed his nerves though and he closed his eyes for another ten minutes. 

 

It was still snow outside but the weather was slowly getting warmer as time passed which made him feel happier. And Yixing had came by for a dinner two weeks ago to talk about the progress of their investigation. Apparently according to what they knew one of the royal brothers could be alive unless he'd ended up as a casualty in war or died of sickness. But he could be close to the border to china or still roaming the southern parts of Korea. 

 

According to some documents they found the youngest son had been sent away to a southern part of Korea for studies at a young age and once the war started they didn't allow him to come back to the capitol. Yifan wondered what the possibility was for him to still be alive. A part of him hoped he was. While he was a part of the country he'd fought against, if he had gotten away for this long he deserved his life. But he knew very well he'd be executed on sight once he was found and goes for the prince’s own sake he had died of disease years ago. 

 

Also to be spared the heartache of losing his whole family in a vicious murder based of war. 

 

Just as he was about to get out of the tub he heard the faint knock on his door from downstairs. Frowning slightly he grabbed his robe, ran a hand through his hair to get the wet strands out of his eyes before heading down. The knock was heard again, faster this time. 

 

When opening the door Junmyeon stood there with tears streaming down his cheeks. “Junmyeon?” The younger just threw himself into his arms, letting out a sob before Yifan could even finish what to say. 

 

Taking a stumbling step bs l he gripped onto the younger as he carefully moved them to sit on the floor. “He touched me..” Junmyeon cried against his shoulder, gripping the robe with trembling hands. “Yifan he kept touching me but I said  _ no _ ..”

 

Slowly things pieced together to why Junmyeon was upset and his blood ran cold. Looking down at him and carefully pried the saddened male from his chest to look at him. It was then he noticed the bleeding lip and bruised cheekbone. 

 

Indescribable rage filled him at the thought of anyone harming Junmyeon filled him. How dare anyone do this to a angel like him? The most beautiful song bird had been tarnished. He couldn't even begin to describe how furious this made him. 

 

As Junmyeon trembled in fear Yifan was shaking in anger. 

 

Carefully placing a kiss on his forehead Yifan then went to wipe away the dried blood from the corner of his lip. “Who did this to you?”

 

“The bar owner. He's been trying to force himself on me for weeks. Even when I started! But last week he decided not to give me my pay if I didn't sleep with him and I refused. It angered him and he became aggressive.”

 

Junmyeon drew a deep shaky breath before continuing and Yifan gently massaged the back of his neck. “I'm late on rent and I went to ask for my money and he….and he said I'd have to be on my knees for it. I said no and he told me I didn't have a choice anymore. He hit me…..” trailing off Junmyeon then looked up at Yifan and shifted closer. “But I ran away. I ran straight to you. I didn't know where else to go. I have no one else, nowhere else ….”

 

Yifan was fuming, pulling Junmyeon back into his chest to let him cry he looked out the door on the light snow falling down in the dark outside. “You did right by coming to me. You know I'll take care of you. I'm sorry I wasn't there to save you…has he touched you before?” 

 

Feeling a nod against his chest Yifan simply closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down. “He showed interest when employing me. But I brushed it off and he never seemed to care until three weeks ago. He just-just wouldn't stop harassing me in my changing room. He hasn't had me….I'd never be able to look at myself if he did.”

 

Breaking down into tears again Yifan carded his fingers through his hair and nose down onto his neck. “I'll kill him for touching you…” the younger didn't reply, just pressed closer, sniffling. 

 

Breathing out through his nose Yifan closed his eyes and pressed his lips against Junmyeon's head. “I'll do it if you want me to.”

 

“I just wish it didn't happen to start with...I can't go back, I don't want to go back. But I'm already behind with my rent….they-they'll throw me out.” Junmyeon sobbed, trying to regain some calm. 

 

“You don't need to worry about something like that..you can stay here, we'll go collect your things and tell your landlord you're moving tomorrow. Now….let's get you a bath. I'll draw a new one and we can go to bed afterwards.” The younger nodded in agreement, still clinging to Yifan as he closed the heavy door and walked upstairs to the bathtub. 

 

As the water filled up Yifan took his time kissing the youngers cheeks and forehead as he removed the robe and button up silk shirt. Every newly revealed bruise made him feel sick. Brushing his fingers over them gently he debated to end the man's life for touching his lover. However, he was aware he had probably killed and hurt several lovers in his time. It made him think. 

 

“Let me wash your hair..” Yifan said as he helped the still shaking man into the warm water, letting him sink down and relax. For a while he simply massaged his scalp and then used shampoo to clean his hair. Carefully using the scoop to pour water over the sudds until it was washed off. Adding rose oil to his hair Yifan gently ran his long fingers through the dark hair for a good five minutes until Junmyeon wanted to get up. 

 

As Yifan badded the water from his skin his eyes glared at the marks that weren't his, as if it'd make them go away just by that. Junmyeon had stopped crying but his head hung low while he placed a kiss to each mark and dressed him in one of his own shirts. “Lets go to bed okay.”

 

“Okay.” Junmyeon's voice was raspy and low as Yifan took his hand and guided the younger to the very familiar bed. Yifan made sure he was comfortable before getting in himself, pulling him close to his chest. 

 

“Is this alright? Is it alright if I hold you?” The last thing he wanted to do was upset him further, but Junmyeon snuggled closer as a response. “Can I kiss you? You’ll have to tell me if I go to far...I hope you know you can always tell me to stop and I will.”

 

“Yifan as long as it’s you, it’s you I want to be with.” The sound was muffled against his neck but he pulled away to meet his eyes and it ached in Yifan at the sight of the red rimmed brown hues. “I love you and I trust you...and I know you wouldn’t hurt me.” Gently running his knuckles along the soft round jaw Yifan smiled at Junmyeon and leaned in to kiss his forehead. 

 

“Sleep now my love..” 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Junmyeon had settled down well in his house, he didn't own much and fit it all in the part of his closet and a few shelves. Yifan had made sure to stock up with things Junmyeon's favorite foods and had gotten him his own comb and oils to use for his hair. 

 

Yifan had gone to the bar Junmyeon worked at and found the manager who assaulted his lover a day after he came to his house. With a handgun tucked by his hips he charmed his way with status and smiles into the manager's office and with a stern look and showing of the gun he threatened the man. Stating the precautions he would face if he'd take this forward to authority was enough to scare him and have him apologize. But Yifan knew he only was sorry he was caught. 

 

With a promise that he'd not let him off as easy next time he left, going back home to his Junmyeon who was asleep in their bed. 

 

It had been over a month now and it was beginning to get warmer outside and they started having breakfast outside in the sun. Junmyeon learned to cook since apparently he hadn't done that all that often and if he did it was simple meals. But Yifan had no problem cooking dinner with him and seeing the smile on Junmyeon's face as he learned something new or the colonel would compliment his cooking. 

 

The attack was no longer haunting the younger and he was more at peace, Yifan was sure Junmyeon wouldn't be disturbed, but it still bothered him once he was called into the capital for a week. Before leaving he collected food for Junmyeon to cook and eat. He kissed his cheeks and told him he'd be back soon before leaving. 

 

Yixing greeted him at the office with a smile and nod as he arrived. He and Han had apparently came on a new lead about this prince from the Republic of Korea. Something that someone of this fan's status should know. 

 

There was no time for a rest once he arrived, and he was instantly ushered into the meeting room with a few more people. After some introduction and recap of what had happened since the last meeting. 

 

Yifan didn't focus much on what was being said, but what caught his interest was a few letters found in a village on the border to china addressed to the nameless prince from his siblings at home. Why would he live so close to the enemy? And it had been proved he at least knew that he was of royal descent. 

 

None of them understood why a lead from the southern parts of the peninsula ended up at the border. Han told them about how the village had been passed through by their armies years ago and people captured. They'd however not found any war prisoners in the age they assumed the prince was. Which meant there was a big chance that he indeed was dead. But the fact that the emperor would have sent his youngest son to a battle zone waiting to be still puzzled them. 

 

They didn't have anyone to identify a body even if they found one but they didn't know if he could've died years or months ago. Or if it was even from the war. And no one from the village spoke about someone with the surname Kim. But they had a lead, and they might find more belongings, leading to the probable discovery of where he could be, and if he was alive. No one wanted to waste time in case he had a plan to rebel against the new regime. In that case he'd be in Korea. 

 

Days went on, long meetings that for Yifan all sounded the same. It wasn't until the general said his name he snapped back into reality. “Your first mission as colonel commandant will be to accompany the group sent out to Korea next year.”

 

Nodding and with a “yes sir” the meeting had ended along with the week and he was allowed back home. With a bitterness of being sent of barely two years after arriving home. And after finding Junmyeon it felt even worse. But at least he was on the train back home daydreaming about his lover. Perhaps they could never be more than that, but it didn't bother him the slightest. 

 

It was late when he returned home, trying to keep quiet as he closed the door behind him. Tiptoeing up the stairs he peeked into their bedroom and Junmyeon was curled up at his side of the bed, hugging Yifan's pillow to his chest and it brought a fond smile to his face. Going to another room to undress from his army clothes and simply going to bed in his underwear Yifan slipped down under the covers next to Junmyeon, kissing his head before closing his eyes. 

 

Yifan woke up be the feeling of a gentle hand caressing his chest and soft lips against his collarbone. “Mmmh….morning.” The colonel rasped, pulling Junmyeon closer, groaning as he nuzzled into his hair, the familiar scent making him feel like home. 

 

Junmyeon giggled and hugged him back, leaning up to kiss the corner of the elders lips. “Morning...it was a very pleasant surprise to wake up next to you again. It's been cold and lonely sleeping alone these past days…”

 

“Me too. I missed holding you through the night. Like missing a piece of myself.” He hummed and kissed his cheek, then his lips. “You're adorable when you sleep, all curled up…..did you hug my pillow every night when I was gone?” 

 

“That's a secret.” He whispered and sealed that with a kiss. “However I baked bread yesterday for us to have for breakfast. I thought we could celebrate a little.”

 

Yifan smiled, feeling completely and utterly in love with the young singer in his arms. Burying his face into his neck Yifan took a few deep breaths, relishing in the sweet scent of rose for another minute before he deemed himself ready to get up from bed. 

 

Junmyeon basically pushed him down to sit on the chair in the kitchen and told him that he’d be making breakfast and he should just relax after his hard working week. That brought back his assignment and Yifan sighed. 

 

“I'll be sent off next year. I'm needed for a mission and I'm not sure how long I'll be gone either or when exactly I'm leaving.” Yifan turned around to see the frown on his lovers brows and the slight pout as he held the tea leaves. 

 

“But...you came back like, a few months ago? Is there any issue?” Junmyeon muttered and turned his back to continue with warming water and the bread he had baked. 

 

“I came back almost a full year ago, but the general is worried about this kid of the emperor being a problem… they found records in the palace about another kid of his and think they’ve tracked him down to a village to the border of China. I don’t think he’s alive, and even if he is, there shouldn’t be a threat. But they want to make sure none of them are alive. To end the lineage you know? I think we should focus on better things, like actually merging the countries and start working as one.”

 

“Another prince? And why would he be so close to China?” Junmyeon questioned and Yifan chuckled, since he too had asked exactly the same thing and just shrugged at Junmyeon who placed down a few plates of food on the table. “Maybe I’ve met him since i also lived close to the border.” He laughed and Yifan grinned, shaking his head as he stood up to help with the tea even if Junmyeon protested. 

 

“Maybe so, but you were young when you left, the prince must’ve arrived before the war.” He thought aloud and poured up tea into their cups. “However, can I be brutally honest with you Junmyeon?” The younger nodded, sitting down across him with a gentle smile. Yifan made a scene of looking to his right and then left before leaning over the small table a little and cupped a hand to the side of his face as he whispered. “I don’t think the general has a good plan.”

 

Junmyeon feigned a gasp, putting a hand over his mouth. “How could you say that…. About your  _ general _ ! I should report you for treason.” They shared a laugh and ate their breakfast and Yifan couldn’t believe Junmyeon was such a good baker. Praising him over and over about how fluffy and tasty the bread was. 

 

As the day went on Junmyeon seemed rather distant, as if he was thinking of something. But Yifan didn’t pry, he’d been gone for a while and as long as they were together Yifan was happy. Kissing the tousles of dark hair as they listened to some records Yifan caressed his legs that were thrown over his lap. Nothing seemed off, he just looked as if he was thinking.

 

“What’s on your mind?” Yifan finally asked once the sun had set, the candles burning low and the sixth record playing a soft quiet tune for them. His finger curled under the youngers chin and gently caressed it over his chin until he looked up.

 

“Just...what will I do when you leave. I longed for you the first day you left… if I can barely survive a week without you then how will I manage what….a year, two? You don’t even know how long you’ll be gone. Will you be gone until you find him dead? Or alive? It took this long for them to figure out that he lived close to the border at one point.” 

 

Yifan didn’t know what to say, simply letting out a sigh. What could he say, he didn’t know how long he’d be gone. It could be a few months or five years. “I don’t know...I wish I didn’t have to leave. But it’s my first mission that’ll prove that I can rank up. But I find it useless to  go, it’s a mission that doesn’t make sense to me.”

 

“Can’t you...decline?” His voice sounded desperate and still hopeful, hand cupping his jaw. 

 

“I can’t...I wish I could, but it would anger the general and I might be dismissed, retired early. It’d be shameful.” He muttered, turning his head to place a kiss to the soft palm, cupping it with his own larger and rougher on. “One day I’ll come home and I won’t have to leave.”

 

“And how long will I have to wait until then?” Junmyeon’s voice was just above a whisper as their eyes locked. They stayed like that until Yifan leaned in a little closer, lips just millimeters from the younger’s.

 

“I don’t know…” His lips brushed against the singer’s as he spoke before pressing them together, moving both hands to his waist as Junmyeon moved to sit in his lap. They shared kiss after kiss, holding onto each other as if they would vanish if they let go.

 

Yifan couldn’t explain how it felt to kiss Junmyeon and hold him in his arms, how many feeling he harbored for this man in his arms. It made his whole chest swell and ache with fondness, whole body tingling. His lips were so soft against his, gentle but firm, knowing exactly what he wanted. It was like seeing whole clusters of stars behind his eyelids when they touched, it felt like being filled with light to just be around Junmyeon and god was he lucky to be there with him.

 

His hands rubbed gentle circles on his waist as tongues twisted together and Junmyeon’s hips stuttering forward. Yifan could feel the hardness in the cotton underwear he wore and the colonel kissed down his neck, teeth grazing over the blemish free skin. Tongue toothing the red lines and hand sneaking up under the thick knitted sweater, feeling the hot plush skin under his fingertips.

 

Beautiful breathless gasps and moans left the younger as his hips rolled gently against the other’s thigh. His head leaned back as Yifan kissed along his neck to his collar bone and sucking on it his fingers kept massaging into Junmyeon’s moving hips. His own pants began to feel strained and he groaned against the red mark he left on the left collar bone. “I’ll figure it out..I promise I won’t leave you for too long.” 

 

“Yifan…” Junmyeon breathe din response, leaning down to kiss along his jaw and began undoing his pants and the elder got the cue, lifting his hips to pull them down to his knees and kissed his cheek.

 

They had been intimate several times in their relationship, after all that’s how it had started. But it always felt like the first time when Yifan kissed him, pushed a finger into Junmyeon and the reactions he received. It was like second nature for Yifan how to make Junmyeon feel good, to make him twist and trash in his hold as he sang the songs only for his ears.

 

Yifan pressed a third finger in and kissed behind his ear, whispering promises of love. Clothes were discarded onto the floor around them, the both of them naked as they indulge in what would be considered a crime. But how could something illegal feel so good?

 

“You ready?” Junmyeon nodded hastily, eyes lidded and cheeks flushed. His lips were red and so were the marks decorating his neck and shoulders. There was no hesitation as Junmyeon reached between them, eyes locked while his hand wrapped around his cock. Biting into his plush bottom lip the younger slowly lowered himself onto Yifan, making the latter hiss and grip his hips a little tighter. 

 

With his back rested against the back of the couch and head leaning against a pillow as Junmyeon made himself comfortable Yifan drank in every little inch of his body, movement, everything.. He was truly an angel sent from heaven. Leaning forward the elder kissed his chest gently, rolling his thumbs over the hardened nipples, feeling Junmyeon squirm in his lap. It felt so good. He felt so good. 

 

It took a minute for Junmyeon to move but soon he was lifting up from his lap and then lowering himself back down with a moan and Yifan joined in, letting out a groan and helping him move at a slow pace. Even if it was a frequent activity, Yifan refused to have Junmyeon harm himself just to give him pleasure. It had happened once before, they had gone too hard too fast and to Yifan’s horror Junmyeon had been bleeding. Even if the younger assured him it was fine Yifan couldn’t sleep that night thinking about what he’d done. But the loving smile Junmyeon offered every time he woke up in his arm soothed him.

 

It was a little difficult moving in the couch, but Junmyeon was skilled, moving in rhythm with gentle moans and hands gripping onto Yifan’s shoulders. Junmyeon’s head was tilted back, mouth agape as he slowly moved his hips, lifting up then dropping down with controlled moves. He whined gently and Yifan wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled him down so that he was resting on his chest.

 

Kissing his cheek Yifan carefully moved up into him, arms wrapped securely around Junmyeon's waist. “You're so beautiful.” His voice was low and raspy as he whispered into his ear and Junmyeon gasped in response, thighs trembling and lips gently pressing against his neck. 

 

Yifan used his thumbs to gently rub his hips as he continued to move and Junmyeon was moving to the best of his ability. I'm the midst of the heated intimacy the younger presses their lips together into a gentle kiss. “I love you…..” The kisses were gentle and it made Yifan melt under him, wrapping his arms around him and happily kissed Junmyeon back. 

 

The movements were slowly turning slower and unable to move as high. The colonel realized he was getting tired so gently sitting up straight he gave the younger a kiss to his cheek. “You're doing so good.” A kiss to his collarbone. “You're so mesmerizing.” 

 

Junmyeon had a tired shy smile on his lips as they were turning over, laying him down on the couch and Yifan kneeling between his legs. “You feeling good?” The younger nodded and reached out, pulling him down to his chest. 

 

“So good. You make me see stars Yifan.” Leaning in to kiss Junmyeon the elder continued to move at a gentle phase, not wanting to hurt him. “Please touch me.”

 

The colonel licked his lips as he looked over the younger before letting go of his waist to wrap a hand around his leaking cock. With a few strokes to tests the waters Yifan soon got a rhythm going that seemed to have Junmyeon on edge and moaning for more. It baffled him each time he simply looked on the young man, how something so sinful could be this beautiful. How Junmyeon could look so beautiful in his most vulnerable state. But then again he wasn’t of this world.

It didn’t take long until Junmyeon was arching off the couch, mouth open in a raspy high-pitched gasp as he came. Clamping down on Yifan the elder let out a grunt at the pressure and began thrusting quicker and quicker, seeking his own bliss. It wasn’t hard to do so with Junmyeon chanting sweet words to him over and over until he released inside him with a muffled moan against the younger’s neck.

For a while they stayed like that, with Junmyeon clutching onto Yifan’s naked back and breath calming down gradually as Yifan kissed over his sweaty skin in lazy motions. “I love you..”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The snow had disappeared from the ground and been replaced by flourishing greens. Yifan had nurtured his garden back to life with the help of Junmyeon, cleaning out weeds and cutting dead branches off the bushes and trees that they could reach. It'd been some work but it was worth it to sit in a clean kept garden in the morning enjoying the rays of early sun. 

 

Junmyeon seemed to be fond of sitting by the koi pond to sing, sometimes running his fingers along the surface as the fish danced for him. 

 

It was, at a lack of better words, amazing. They could live in privacy and not worry about judging eyes behind the hedges. The only thing they didn't protect them from was storms. 

 

It had been raining almost all week when Yifan found the letter addressed to him and he immediately recognized the paper from Han. It must be a report on the new developments of his case. 

 

As he walked back into his house from the post box under his umbrella he wondered what it contained. If there were any actual updates to this case or if he'd come to a dead end. Hopefully it's already come to an end so that he didn't need to worry about going away from Junmyeon. 

 

Speaking of, the younger was lying in the couch with a blanket thrown over him as he snuggled into the warmth. It wasn't cold outside, or inside for that matter, but he'd learnt that Junmyeon hated the cold. Which only bothered him more thinking about how he'd had to live the past years. 

 

Sitting down in the kitchen he lit a candle and easily opened the letter with the letter opener kept in a drawer. As suspected it was from Han. But what he didn't expect was the news about a breakthrough. Furrowing his brows as he read through it. 

 

There were records of a Kim Suho arriving in Musan the same time as the prince was recorded to have left the palace. It could be nothing, but they had found clear evidence of a imperial gown in one of the houses hidden under the floorboards. However, Musan had always been under the military's supervision and heavily influenced by China, so them missing something like this was baffling. Even the records showed this Kim Suho had ties to Seoul so suspicious had risen for Han and the group had traveled out to the city. And sharing the same surname as the emperor it raised a few flags.

 

It had avoided most destruction when the first armies invaded by admitting defeat and letting the armies pass through without a fight, even letting them use it as a checkpoint. However that was years before Yifan even joined the military, and the stories he’d heard about what they had done to the women there made his stomach turn.

 

Though the clue that connected Kim Suho to the palace and late royal family was the documents about a “guardian” written in hangul. Because the royal robes might as well have been stolen and hidden not to face prosecution for stealing something from the emperor. However the name and word Suho appeared too frequently at the same time span for it to be a coincidence. 

 

Now they just needed to see if they could find records of him leaving the town or any gravestones with the same name. As well as search through the palace even more, now when they had a new lead they might find something new that could crack the case.

 

But in Han’s theory Kim Suho had passed into China and Yifan had a hard time imagining that to be a plausible. Flipping the second page over he read the quick recap of what was going to happen when Junmyeon came into the kitchen, sock clad feet barely making a sound against the wooden floor. “What are you muttering about?” He asked as he wrapped his arms around his neck, kissing the stubble on his jaw before resting his head against Yifan’s.

 

“Work, they found something that they think will lead them closer to figure this all out.” Turning back to the first page he let the letter go and leaned back into Junmyeon. “I just hope they’ll figure it out so I won’t have to go anywhere. But you never know when they’ll send a letter requesting me there.” 

 

Junmyeon moved one hand down along his chest and hummed. “It took Han four months to come to this conclusion so maybe you’re safe.” Yifan smiled and nodded, turning his head to kiss his temple before standing up, collecting the letter and the opener and putting them in the same drawer. 

 

As they sat together on the couch Yifan had Junmyeon pulled up against his chest and a arm securely around him as the younger relaxed. He wondered if it was true, it felt far reaching but maybe there was something in Han’s theory. What if this Kim Suho was the emperor’s son and had left Musan to cross into China, but surely they would know about it. The guards by the border kept up to date with everyone who went past. If anyone had knowledge of this crossing it’s be the border guards. Unless he’d been brought back as a war prisoner. But in that case he’d be found in the lists of captured Koreans, and he knew no one under the age of 25 had been taken prisoner. 

 

Unless he sneaked over, or went by boat along the coast. Then no one would’ve spotted him, and if they did he’d just be shot on sight and left there. Junmyeon shifted to lay on his side and Yifan wondered exactly how close to the boarder his lover had lived, and sometimes he even wondered what side.

 

Afterall he’d never gotten to know his surname, and even if his first name was Korean due to his close living to the border, his surname would surely be Chinese. However, he found himself not caring where Junyeon came from because he still loved him. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Yifan didn’t mean to snoop, but the diary was laying under the mattress when he changed the sheets and he out of curiosity opened it to see what it was, wondering if he had accidentally stuffed a book down there at night. But as he saw the handwriting and photos of Junmyeon he quickly closed it and stuffed it back before putting the new washed sheet on. 

 

He felt bad for even seeing it and knowing about it’s hiding space but he didn’t want to tell Junmyeon that he’d accidentally found it and tell him to find a new hiding place. But he wondered who that was next to Junyeon in the picture, it looked like a older man, maybe his father. But he refused to take a second look and didn’t want to push Junmyeon into showing him.

 

After making the bed he walked down the stairs to where Junmyeon was finishing up dinner, humming a song he didn’t recognize. He wondered if he missed to sing in front of an audience. He had tried asking if he wanted to find a new club or bar to sing at, or even a theatre. But Junmyeon had seemed unsure and a little afraid still. Yifan didn’t blame him, he had been through something traumatic and he could only imagine how it felt to even think about going back. 

 

Kissing his cheek as Junmyeon held up a spoon for him to taste the pan fried dish. Nodding in approval he brought out a bottle of rice wine, it was a friday and they decided to have a little luxury. The food was still steaming as the younger scooped it onto the plates and happily served the both of them. 

 

“Let’s eat.” He said, sitting down with a wide smile and starting with tasting the wine. Yifan always enjoyed Junmyeon’s cooking and today was no exception, it was delicious like always. However the younger had to make his own fermented kale with chilli and he remembered it to be called kimchi and belonged to Korea. But just because the dish belonged to a country didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy it.

 

Yifan thought back onto the photo in the diary. It didn’t look like he was as young as Junmyeon said he was when he lost his parents. And they wore rather lavish clothes. Maybe his family had been wealthy and the war had taken it away from them. But why would Junmyeon lie? 

 

Sure Yifan was the enemy if he truly was from Korea, and he was the one to put an end to the emperors family. But why would Junmyeon seem so genuine and even want to approach anyone from the military if that was the case. 

 

And the more he thought of it, Junmyeon took from the other side of the border more than the one he currently lived on. 

 

“Where did you get the recipe for this from? It’s amazing.” He didn’t mean to sound like he interrogated Junmyeon, he just wanted him to be more honest with him. “Is it from your hometown?”

 

“Yes, it’s my mother’s recipe actually. And since it’s a easy dish I learnt it pretty quick. But it’s harder to find the ingredients here.” 

 

“Because it’s Korean ingredients?” 

 

Junmyeon nodded and chuckled. “I couldn’t even find kimchi here, too bad, it’s really good. But I guess you won’t find it in the capitol. But if you like it I could make some more and store it.”

 

Yifan nodded with a smile. “Did your mom teach you how to make that too?”

 

“Yeah, my father wasn't one to cook, not many men are. You’re the first exception I’ll make!” Yifan laughed and shook his head, taking a sip of the rice wine. “It’s good to know, if I didn’t know how to cook I probably would’ve died a long time ago.” 

 

“I agree. I knew early that I wouldn’t have a woman around the house so I took it into my own hands to learn it. Though my parents never really taught me, but I have all of my mother’s cookbooks left after they passed.”

 

“Good that we both know how to cook, and different foods too. It makes it even more fun to be in the kitchen together. But I bet you could survive on eating out every day with the money you got.”

 

“I suppose eat out and nothing else, but it’s a way of living I suppose.” Junmyeon drank the last of his wine and leaned back, food finished a while ago. “More wine?”

 

The younger shook his head and they began taking the dishes to the sink and retired to the bedroom to read. Yifan wasn’t sure if Junmyeon had done it before, but the younger put his hand under the mattress and felt around for a bit before pulling it out and taking his pants off. Probably making sure his diary was still there. 

 

Yifan chuckled and ran a hand over his hair. “Not pleased with how I made the bed?” Junmyeon blushed and suddenly had a hard time finding words. “I’m just teasing.”

 

“I know, I was just….checking something.” Yifan nodded and kissed his forehead, walking over to his side of the bed and taking of his pants as well, changing the shirt to his sleeping shirt before grabbing his glasses and book before getting on the bed.

 

“Yifan?” Looking up from the book he made a sound of acknowledgement for his lover to continue. “Do you think they’ll actually find this Suho? And that he’s the son of the emperor?” Junmyeon asked while getting on the bed, leaning up to his chest, making himself comfortable.

 

Closing the book again Yifan just shrugged. “In all honesty I hope they won’t. That family has suffered enough. While I understand the motives and I followed by them, I think the whole thing should be called off. I’ve fought and killed men in war, but this is just a manhunt that’ll end with a execution that I don’t feel right with.”

 

“But, Kim Suho could have nothing to do with the palace, or just’ve been a worker there. But anything could be possible I think. I just hope he’s long away from here and won’t be found if he really is the son of the emperor.”

 

“So you’re not worried about him starting a rebellion? You all fought so hard for this and then just losing it?”

 

“I don’t know. I thought I’d feel good when the war was over, and getting ranked up. But I’m not sure what I feel anymore, I just want to distance myself from it. I made my father proud so for me, I wouldn’t care.”

 

“I see.” Junmyeon nuzzled closer and Yifan kissed his head before starting to read for them both, continuing where they left of yesterday.

 

When going to bed that night with Junmyeon in his arms he thought back on if he wanted to continue his work in the military. Yes it’d be a shame to leave, but it was more appealing to think about a future with Junmyeon, one that was certain. Without death and war. 

 

Maybe it wouldn’t seem as honourless leaving the force after such great achievements. Perhaps he could have a few words with the admiral and find something else to do. He knew Junyeon didn’t like the idea of him coming home in a body bag or to be gone for several years, neither violence. So of course, if he wanted to live with him and love him, he should maybe rethink this.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It was definitely not the first time he heard Junmyeon sing in the bath, but it was the first time he had to stop and actually listen because it wasn’t in his mother tongue, it was the language he learned before going to war. He only understood it on a basic level and he’d found it annoying to listen to and learn as a young soldier. But hearing Junmyeon sing in Korean had him breathless, it sounded like it had to belong to something holy.

 

He must’ve stood there for a while, the song putting him in a trance, because soon the door opened and a shocked Junmyeon stood in front of him in his bathing robe. “Oh, Yifan. Did I take to long?”

 

“No, no I just…..I listened to you singing, I keep forgetting how beautiful it is. I just can’t seem to get enough of it. Sorry for eavesdropping I suppose.” Junmyeon just smiled and shook his head at him and took his hand.

 

“My voice is for you to listen to, I want you to hear me. Would I be singing out loud if I didn’t?” The fact that Junmyeon didn’t even feel bothered that he heard him sing in another language told him that maybe there were nothing more to his connection to their culture more than how he lived so close to the border. 

 

“You were singing in korean?” Junmyeon nodded and smiled brightly. “Do you know a lot of songs in that language?”

 

“Yes, I do. I know a few in japanese as well. But I don’t know them good enough to sing on stage. Plus I don’t think it’d be so appreciated for me to sing in any other language than chinese.”

 

“Indeed, can you speak it to?” To his surprise Junmyeon nodded again, looking down to their hands before looking back up when Yifan continued. “Was any of your parents Korean?” There were a bit of nervosity in those usually calm eyes and wondered if Junmyeon was scared of him. “Junmyeon, I don’t mind if they are. I don’t care if you’re from the other side of the border. So please don’t worry about who you are, because I’ll love you no matter what.”

 

The younger seemed to take a moment to think, eyes blinking as he tried to find his words. Or maybe he was analyzing Yifan’s. It took a minute before he carefully wiped his cheeks, and Yifan wondered why he was crying.

 

“I don’t want to admit I’ve been lying to you.” The singer looked up to meet his eyes, never letting go of his hand as he did. “It makes it real.”

 

“I don’t blame you for lying. You’re telling me the truth now aren’t you?” Junmyeon nodded, taking a step back to lean against the wall and Yifan followed and lifted their hands to place a kiss to the knuckles. 

 

“I grew up in Seoul, but my parents sent me away for schooling in a village not far from the border. That’s where I learned your language among other studies. The war had started by then but the village had been spared from the army so my parents deemed it safe enough.” Sighing he looked down to their hands. “I just twisted the truth when you asked me. I guess I was scared...You were the soldier who finished the fight afterall.”

 

Yifan understood the nervosity he might’ve felt around him, but he wondered why he’d gone with him home in that case. And how did he really feel about Yifan murdering their emperor and his family. “But somehow I still trusted you. When you told me we were equal I felt….strangely safe.”

 

“I hope you know now that I’d never hurt anyone without reason or if I’m on the battlefield.”

 

“I do now, but I didn’t back then. But, I fell in love with you as strange as it is. And...now you know, that I’m not from the same country as you, even the enemy’s country.”

 

“It doesn’t change my feelings for you, nothing could.” 

 

For a while they stood like that, holding hands and the water dripping from Junmyeon’s still damp hair onto the robe and wooden floor. It was silent except for a few birds singing outside and it reminded him of the man in front of him and he wondered if those were migrated from the same part of the world as him as well.

 

“I love you Yifan. So much. Thank you for being here for me and for not judging me.” Yifan smiled and brushed a few strands from his face and kissed his forehead. 

 

“I love you too, and I wish I could tell the whole world.” Junmyeon giggled and he could see how his eyes were still watery. “Come, let’s get you dry and into some actual clothes. I was thinking about going out tonight for dinner.”

 

“Out? We haven’t done that in a while.” They both knew why their outings weren’t frequent in fear of being found out. And now Yifan had another thing to add to the list. The admiral and his fellow soldiers probably wouldn’t be so glad to hear he courted the enemy. But as long as they went as friends and didn’t touch or kiss it was fine.

 

“I just decided. To celebrate I suppose? I wish they had something with food from your home as well...but I know a few other good places. Is that okay with you?”

 

“Of course, why wouldn’t it be? As much as I love your cooking and at home candle lit dinners, it would be fun to go out. It’s not too cold outside either.” Yifan nodded and they agreed on eating out.

 

They didn’t really dress up, but it still felt special to them. Walking hand in hand as far as they could they ventured further into town to find the restaurant Yifan had in mind. It was a beautiful evening with the sun low in the sky, painting it in orange, pink and yellow. Junmyeon was walking next to him looking at the sky until they had to enter the building and Yifan asked if he wanted a outside table, but Junmyeon told him he rather be hidden away in some little corner so they could have more privacy.

 

In the end they got seated by a window in a rather secluded corner, and Junmyeon got the view of the window, but Yifan didn’t mind because he got to best view either way. They ordered a bottle of wine as they read through the menu.Junmyeon ended up with roasted duck and Yifan pork dumplings. 

 

It was great wine and even better food and they both found it nice to have a night without cooking themselves and just having great service. There was a woman singing on the stage a little further away so they could still hear the music, however Junmyeon had said “she can’t even hold a note” under his breath when taking their seats and Yifan had laughed.

 

However he looked at her longingly, probably missing being on stage himself and Yifan wondered if one day he’d feel ready to do it again, and when he did Yifan would make sure that it wasn’t on some shabby club but a established restaurant like this. The idea of opening his own place and have Junmyeon sing in it passed him and it made him consider it, perhaps it wasn’t that bad of a idea.

 

“I’m still sorry I lied to you for so long.” Junmyeon broke the silence after a small conversation about what to do next week and sliced his knife through the duck. “And it was hard for me to find myself telling you the truth in fear of what you’d do. Not because of...where I was from, but that I had lied about it. I think truth is the most important thing in a ...friendship too.” He was clearly trying to void anything to sound suspicious or out them to the public in case someone was listening.

 

“LIke I said, my good friend” Yifan winked at Junmyeon who smiled in return, “I appreciate that you found it in yourself to tell me. I had my suspicions, but I wasn’t going to push you to tell me. Not like anything would change if you decided not to tell me either.” Taking a sip of the wine he took half of a dumpling.

 

“I suppose so.” He seemed to be lost in thought for a moment as he ate a few more pieces of his duck and Yifan filled up their glasses again, giving him time to reflect. When dinner was over they decided to get some desert as well, a mooncake each with lotus filling. Just to have something to eat to the last of their wine. Just like the food the dessert was just as good and they continued light conversation. After paying the check they left, walking back home to their house.

 

As they looked at the moon and stars in the sky Yifan spoke “I’ve been thinking Junmyeon. I’m leaving the military.”

 

“You’re doing what?” They had entered the small road up the hill to reach his house and their hands had found one another. Junmyeon slowed down into a stop and looked up at Yifan who just smiled and repeated what he’d just said. “B-but your dad and-”

 

“He’s long gone, and I’m sure he’d still be proud of me. I’m tired of being the cause of pain, I want to live a peaceful life, with you.”

 

“Yifan….” Tears welled up in his eyes and he fell into his chest and Yifan caught him, kissing the crown of his head and rubbing his back. 

 

“Hey, no need to cry my little songbird.” When parting Junmyeon wiped his cheeks and nodded, simply looking at him and the emotion playing in his features were hard to read, but the smile was priceless.

 

When arriving home, still affected by the sweet wine, they tumbled into bed. Yifan on top of Junmyeon as they shared kiss after kiss, whispering promises of love and better times. Of a universe only they could reach. 

 

Yifan knew exactly what part to kiss and touch to have the younger sing the song that was only reserved for him. Hands on his hips and lips against his neck Yifan rolled into him over and over and over. Junmyeon had always liked the stars, and Yifan had been told they shone the brightest whenever he touched him. 

 

“I wish we could be more than this.” Yifan whispered as they neared their end, Junmyeon moaning against his neck and arms wrapped tightly around his neck. “I wish I could prove that you’re mine.” With a gasp Junmyeon reached his climax and cried into the crook of his shoulder as he too found is release. Kissing the tears away Yifan promised they would never be apart.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Junmyeon had been distant lately. Spacing out when he sat by himself in the garden looking at the koi or watching the thunderstorms roll in over the city. Yifan was worried he had second guesses about telling him the truth or even being with him. But whenever they were together he was his old self, just losing concentration more often.

 

Yesterday he'd laid in bed majority of the morning and Yifan had fret he'd fallen ill but the younger told him he was fine and just wanted to relax for a while. So he let him be. However Junmyeon had seemed so low yesterday that he'd have to had caught some virus. He didn't even finish his food. 

 

Junmyeon had always been hard working, often denying if there was anything that would hinder him and brush it off as nothing. Only twice had he been so sick he couldn't do his normal chores and both times Yifan had been happy with taking care of him. The younger had blamed him because in his opinion Yifan wanted to take care of him so he made him sick. 

 

Smiling for himself Yifan sat down on the bed they shared and took the book from the side table. They finished reading it a few days ago so he was on a mission to find a new one. 

 

Yifan was reading through the notes in the book when Junmyeon walked in on the wooden boards, creaking under his weight. Looking up from his book he noticed the frown in his brows and Yifan removed his reading glasses. “What is it?”

 

“We need to talk.” Was all he said, not moving to sit down like he usually did but Yifan kept seated. With a nod he encouraged the younger to tell him what was on is mind.

 

Junmyeon was visibly anxious the way he held back with saying whatever he wanted. Then, hesitate, he began speaking. “I didn’t tell you the full truth and it’s eating me alive. I need you to know why I’m doing this.” If Yifan wasn’t wrong he’d think his voice wavered. But he decided not to comment ont hat or the words spoken. However, he straightened up when Junmyeon pulled a handgun from behind his back. “My name is Kim Junmyeon. Son of Kim Siwon, emperor of the Republic of Korea.”

 

Silence settled between them and Yifan widened his eyes in shock. For a moment he just thought about what he said and for some reason he couldn't wrap his head around the concept. Simply looking at the younger who breathed harder the colonel furrowed his brows. 

 

“You-” The words were caught in his throat. Was this a dream? Or some sick joke? His Junmyeon was the son of the man he’d killed in cold blood to please his country and bring him pride. Suddenly all that honour seemed to make him feel nauseous.

 

“Han was right, you know. Kim Suho is the name given to me by my father, Junmyeon is the one I took when I went into hiding. I was sent away from the palace. My father probably knew of his and our family’s fate already. He’s skilled at his work, I do give him that.” His hands trembled and Yifan noticed how his eyes were glossed over, as if he’d cry any second. 

 

Somehow it made sense. Junmyeon's past he'd told him about barely a month ago corilined with Han’s timeline about the prince. Moving from the capitol to a remote to a remote place close to the border. At the same ages too. His secretive attitude around his parents and siblings. Of course he wouldn't name them for him, and too risky to remember a fake one. 

 

However, why had it taken so long for Junmyeon to come to this?

 

“Yifan, when the news came of a Wu Yifan killing the emperor of Korea I was already in China. It was a mere coincidence that you went to the pub I sang at that night. But it was a perfect starting point for my plan to be set in motion. I decided the second I heard about my family's death to avenge them...I expected to find a monster, but-but I found you.”

 

Yifan didn’t want to interrupt, even though all he wanted was to kiss his cheeks and tell him it was okay. But knowing he’d murdered his lovers father made a heavy weight settle on his shoulders. It made him feel nauseous and dizzy. 

 

“The first night we slept together I had planned to shoot you. Kill you and leave. But just couldn't do it. So I waited for the right time, I wanted you to know who I was….but, I didn’t plan to fall for you. I didn’t mean to come back to you. You invaded my country and took my family away from me but I still love you and I don’t know why, but I can’t stop….”

 

“So it’s not been a lie? You loving me?” Yifan asked carefully, finally standing up from the side of the bed and he could hear the birds in the trees and wondered if they’d known all along. “That wasn’t a part of your plan.”

 

“I wish it was.” A tear trickled down his round cheek and hand tightening around the gun as Yifan stood up. “I want to kill you for what you did Yifan, I really do. But I don’t know what I’d do without you. How can I live without your love?”

 

“I fell in love along the way, I started feeling other things than hate and disgust when I talked to you. The more I met you and the more I got to know  _ you _ I realized I'd made a mistake. When I looked at you it felt like my body was on fire, I couldn't stop smiling. You…..you were so kind and thoughtful. And I forgot who you were. Because you didn't treat me different after I told you about me. You always treated me as your equal and I'll never forget those words from you.”

 

For a moment they stood in silence looking at one another, like many times before, but this time was different. Yifan waited for Junmyeon to make a move, to pull his gun, shoot him, anything. However, strangely enough, he felt calm. 

 

They had a good two years, they got to love one another as much as they could. Beautiful moments that he'd never forget. He held genuine love for Junmyeon in his heart, something that's never change and he realized that in the hands of him, Yifan didn't mind if Junmyeon would be the one. 

 

Yifan had never thought of finding anyone, or even experience anything like this. Like Junmyeon. He couldn't pinpoint the exact day or time he fell in love, it felt like it had been all his life. Just looking at him, even with a gun in his hand, seeing the younger made his heart skip a beat. 

 

Maybe he'd fallen in love with the way his eyes disappeared when he laughed, throwing his head back and smiling at him like he was the sun. Or by how he but his soul into his art. Or maybe it was how he'd twist with his fingers when he was nervous and glance to the left, whining almost. When thinking about it, how could he pick any trait, everything about Junmyeon was entirely enchanting and so easy to fall for. 

 

He could see the uncertainty in those dark eyes he fell in love with, and still was. It was cruel in a way, for the two of them to fall in love, but no one could be in control of their emotions. Maybe this was his punishment for causing so much harm. In Yifan’s eyes this was a fitting punishment. 

 

“I want you to finish your mission Junmyeon.” The latter’s eyes widened at his lovers words and Yifan offered him a small smile as he reached out to caress his hair, tucking it behind his ear. “I’ve caused enough damage haven’t I?”

 

“Y-you want me to-” Not managing to finish his sentence Junmyeon looked down, breath coming out quicker and more tears trickling down his cheeks. “Yifan I don’t think I can…everything in my being tells me to do it but I’m so in love with you and I don’t want to lose you.”

 

“You can do anything that pleases you. But I don’t think I can live knowing I’ve killed your father Junmyeon. Is he the person on the picture in your diary?” Junmyeon visibly stiffened and Yifan smiled carefully. “I saw it by accident when I was cleaning but I wasn't going to push you on the subject... You seemed happy, the both of you. And because of me and my troops, you can’t have that anymore. I hurt the person I love and even if you let me live, what would happen to us?”

 

Junmyeon broke out into a sob, crashing into Yifan chest, gun falling to the floor as he cried his heart out. “Why did I have to fall in love with you…” he muttered against his shoulder and Yifan hugged him back. What a twisted situation. 

 

Yifan was the one to kill someone so important to Junmyeon, and his troops giving an end to his brothers and mother. It was a guilt Yifan couldn't live with. To live and look at his lover only to be reminded that he'd been a part of what ruined his life. And Junmyeon, split between his feelings of love and the duty to do right by his family, not knowing what to do. If he let him live he'd let down his father and know that the man he loved was also someone he'd viewed as a vile monster. But, if he was to kill Yifan, would he be able to live with himself?

 

They both had realized they couldn't live without one another, nor live with what they'd done or would do. For Yifan there was only one solution, which was for Junmyeon to kill him and try and go on. But it was harder said than done when you had feelings for someone. The younger couldn't even think of a world without Yifan. 

 

Junmyeon continued to cry and even Yifan found himself tearing up. Closing his eyes as he let a tear fall the elder kissed Junmyeon on the head.  

 

“I want you to kill me Junmyeon, but please sing for me when you do so.”

 

“Yifan, please...I can't live with myself if kill you. I'd have to take my own life for taking yours. I rather die on my own accords than to have the military find me and execute me.” 

 

During a moment of silence they seemed to think about what Junmyeon had said. And Yifan realized that maybe Junmyeon had never had the plan to live through this assassination. Even though it was a viable end now that he knew that the trail Han was following led to someone, Yifan wished he'd run away, away from their troubling nations and start over. 

 

“I'd like you to shoot me Junmyeon. To punish me for what I did, it is what I deserve. You, however could get away, if you run far and fast enough-”

 

“No. If you go, I will to.” New tears trickled down his cheek and yes fan gently wiped them away with him thumb. “Han will find me. He'll track this action back to me. I was cursed to die the day I was born, I knew what my status would bring me.” 

 

“Then. Is this a promise? That I'll see you on the other side?” The way Junmyeon smiled at him made the elder feel a few of his own tears spill over. 

 

“I suppose so Yifan.” Junmyeon inhaled deeply, shaking as he did. Pulling away the younger crouched down to pick the gun back up in his unstable hands. “All my love for you is as real and pure as the new fallen snow.”

 

“And I you, my Junmyeon. Don't fret, we'll be peaceful in the next life. We won't have to hide.” Yifan sat back down on the bed, scooting into the middle. “Will you kiss me goodbye?”

 

Yifan barely got to speak before Junmyeon was on the bed with him, tears rolling down his cheeks as they pressed their lips together for a last time. He didn't want to pull away. Pulling Junmyeon closer Yifan leaned their foreheads together. “We'll be fine.” He whispered to Junmyeon who sobbed before nodding, and Yifan kisses his tear streaked cheek. 

 

Leaning back the elder laid down on the bed and shut his eyes, waiting for what was to come. Junmyeon laid down next to him, the gun clicked once as Yifan wrapped his arms around Junmyeon. “I love you….” he whispered as Junmyeon sang for him. It was in his mother tongue, it sounded just as mesmerizing as any other day. Though he could sense the longing and loss in the song. The angelic voice that had him falling for Junmyeon was the last thing he heard when he fell asleep. 


End file.
